Love Before A Wedding Read online

  One minute turned to two and then three and neither one of us said a word. If anyone else were speaking at the moment, I would not have known. I was deaf to everything else in the world except keeping my game face on. No matter how much I wanted to feel his masculine body against mine or feel those powerful hands stroke the side of my face again, I was sticking to my guns. This time, he would be the one to roll over first.

  “Kerine.” He said my name through tight lips but it was not a greeting, it was a statement.

  “Joshua.” I returned the favor.

  Much like onlookers relieved at the sight of two vehicles narrowly missing one another at a street corner, our audience released an audible sigh.

  Jeanette walked over to me, gently taking my arm, as she moved toward the rear of the church.

  “We’ll be right back. I want to show Keri the room we’ll be using to put on the final touches on the wedding day.”

  As I slid pass Josh’s solid form, I willed myself not to reach over and inhale his manly scent of strong spice now filling my nostrils. In fact, I didn’t even glance in his direction, except out of the narrowest corner of my eye. For that, I was intently proud of myself. I was also pleased at the fact he had not taken his eyes off of me. Game on.

  ****

  “Keri, please don’t do this.”

  “Do what?” I asked Jeanette as I took a tissue from the box on the counter in the bathroom to wipe a slight sheen away from my face.

  “Keri, I know this is going to be difficult for you – for both of you. Please, can we all be as civil as possible to one another for the next few weeks?”

  “By civil, you mean that I can’t slap him upside the head at all?”

  Jeanette’s jaw dropped and then her face quickly recovered. We had known one another for twenty years, since we were five, and she still had a hard time realizing when I was joking – slightly joking.

  “Keri, seriously, please, please, I want this day to be perfect. You know I love you and would not be putting you through this if it didn’t mean the absolute world to me that you be involved with the happiest day of my life.”

  After applying a fresh coating of toasted almond lip color, I turned to Jeanette and saw the distress in her face and eyes. Her usually voluminous blond hair had gone completely flat. She had a smudge of darkness under each eye. Planning this wedding had started out as fun; however, now it had come to the final phase and the stress appeared to be taking a toll on her physical state.

  “Jeanette, I love you too. Girl, that is the one reason why I am still here right now.”

  She offered me a smile that showed her relief.

  “I promise to be on my best behavior,” I said while holding up my version of a scout’s honor pledge, “as long as he remains on his.”

  Chapter 4

  The remainder of the afternoon with the pastor went by without any further showdowns. While Pastor Smith went over the layout of the building with Tyler and Jeanette, Josh and I followed behind solemnly. We always made sure to keep a healthy distance between us and whatever either one of us had to say was directed to someone else in our party, never to one another.

  At the close of the meeting, we all shook hands with the clergyman and headed toward the side door. I was so glad when Tyler grabbed the door for us, because muscle man Josh would have surely ripped this flimsy door off of its hinges. A sly look at Pastor Smith showed his relief as well.

  When we reached Tyler’s mini car and he remotely unlocked the doors, I walked over to Jeanette’s side and waited for her to pull up the seat for me. In the past few moments, I started storing up as much precious oxygen as possible and discreetly started loosening my limbs in preparation of folding myself neatly into the tight space. When Jeanette bent down to grab for the handle, Tyler announced what had to be an obvious joke on his part.

  “Hey, Josh, why don’t you give Keri a ride back home?”

  I turned my head sharply at Jeanette who, in turn, stared drill holes at Tyler.

  “Jeanette?” It was a plea on my part more than anything else. I could not, would not, and did want to be alone with that man.

  Tyler answered before Jeanette had a chance to respond.

  He shrugged his shoulders and said, “It only makes sense. Not more than two hours ago, you were complaining about the cramped space. Josh has plenty of room to spare. Besides, Jeanette and I want to get home in a hurry.”

  He wiggled his brows at her and my stomach turned over at the thought.

  “Spare me the details, guy,” I threw up my hands in surrender.

  “It’s no problem. I can call a cab. Have fun.”

  I stepped around Jeanette without casting a glance. I feared what I would see in her face. I did not want to cause her further undue stress and knew she needed Tyler’s comfort more than my tantrums.

  As I was making my way toward the side entrance with hopes the minister was still around to let me in while I waited on a ride, a wall stepped in front of me. By wall, I mean a large square chest covered by a thin piece of cotton. It would have been a lovely sight, especially since two pebble sized rock hard nipples were clearly poking through the material, if it were not for the tensed arms now folded over and obstructing the perfect view.

  “Don’t be such a child, Kerine.”

  My eyes widened in shock. Was he seriously addressing me about being childish after all the crap he put me through?

  “What did you say?” I put as much force into my voice as was possible.

  “It’s only a ride home. Nothing more. Really, it’s not a problem, for me anyway.”

  His cool blue eyes held steady and his jaw was set tight. Was that a challenge? If Josh truly believed he was so irresistible I would not be able to keep my hands off of him for twenty minutes, he had lost a sizeable portion of his common sense.

  “Fine. Let’s go.”

  ****

  Tyler was serious about Josh having plenty of room to spare. The last time I saw him, when we were splitting up, he was riding off in a four-door sedan and leaving dust trails behind. Now, he had traded up. The sleek mid-sized black SUV was just right. Not so small as to look like a carriage for a soccer mom but not so large as to appear to be compensation for lacking in other areas.

  Josh and I walked in silence the short distance up the street to where he was parked. I made my way over to the passenger door and when I opened it I had to stand there for a moment to plan out how I would make the leap up there. The vehicle was definitely more spacious and sat up higher on the inside than it appeared from the exterior. Before I could lift one tan high-heeled foot, a set of strong hands grabbed me on both sides of my middle and I was up in the air and then being turned to the side and seated in the cloth covered chair.

  “I am a big girl. I can do things all by myself,” I called out to him as the door closed.

  I had responded to his charity with mock distain, yet in those brief seconds every inch of my body had tingled under the wonderfully strong support of his robust hands against me.

  “Yeah, yeah. And you would have still been standing there trying to boost yourself up.”

  On that point he was probably correct and so I was at a loss for a snappy comeback. Josh opened the door on his side, placed himself next to me, and turned over the engine. I quickly glanced over the inside of the vehicle. Working in the city quickly taught me to be very aware of my surroundings at all times. It was immaculately clean, except for a large black tarp slung over the third row of seats in the rear of the vehicle. I dared not ask, besides it was none of my business what he was doing with his life at this point.

  “Strap in,” he commanded and the intensity of his deep voice gave me no choice but to comply. Darn him.

  We were flying up the pike in minutes. I suddenly remembered why I always hesitated to ride with him when we were still a couple. It was the feeling of your life slipping away as he barreled down the road at fifty plus on a thirty-five mile per hour highway and weaving between slower m
oving cars I did not miss. Nor did I miss clutching the door handle with one hand and the having a death grip on the seatbelt with the other, as I was now doing.

  “Really, Keri, is all that necessary?” he slid a sapphire eye in my direction and then back on the road before us.

  “As a matter of fact, speed demon, it is. When you slow down, I’ll release some of the wind I’m holding in my lungs.”

  He laughed. It was a rich, full laugh that pulled a similar one from my lips.

  “Same old, Keri.”

  “Actually, I’m not.” The casual moment had ended, I was back in the here and now.

  “Come to think of it,” that eye stealthily made its way back over to me, “you do look a bit different. I can’t quite put my finger on it.”

  “Anyway, Joshua,” I wanted to remain on formal terms with him for as long as possible, even though it seems he had reverted back to feeling comfortable enough to start calling me by my nickname, “you haven’t even asked where I lived yet.”

  “I know where you live.”

  “Is that right? After all this time, you think you still know me that well?”

  “As a matter of fact, I do know you that well. Once you get comfortable with something, it doesn’t change much after that.”

  “Was that the problem with us?”

  The inquiry slipped out before I was able to hold it in the back. The question had consumed me from the moment when a year and a half ago this handsome, witty, free-spirited man had ended our six relationship and walked out of my life. Only within the last few months, since my “makeover”, have I been able to push it to the recesses of my mind. Maybe having him this close had pushed the question to the forefront once again.

  “Kerine, I – ”

  “No, stop. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ask that.”

  The unmistakable feel of hot tears forming began to sting my eyes. I gathered all of my inner strength and pushed them back. If I had reached up to push them away physically, Josh would know what kind of effect he continued to have on me and I would not allow that to happen.

  “Kerine. Keri, I told you it wasn’t your fault. I was to blame. I fully accept that and always will.”

  “Forget about it, Josh. What’s done is done. You moved on to better things. We have both moved on.”

  “It wasn’t like that,” he elevated his voice with a tone of seriousness and I dared to look over at him.

  He was gripping the steering wheel so tight, his knuckles had had gone first hot red and then albino white. He still kept his deep copper hair tousled as if he had just rolled out of bed and the need to rub my hands through the locks pulsed in my hands. I was at the point of giving in when he spoke before I could act on the impulse.

  “It was never that way, and you know it.”

  “Josh, this is too much for me.”

  I placed both my hands firmly against the thighs of my dark dress pants and was prepared to hold them there indefinitely if needed.

  “Jeanette and Tyler are two of my closest friends. I want their wedding day to be perfect and I realize that means having to be around you more often again for the next few weeks. What I do not want is to open up old wounds.”

  His vehicle pulled up to and stopped at the red light at an intersection. Josh let his head drop to his chin. Another urge hit me and my limbs betrayed me as my left hand slipped over and covered his right one on the steering wheel. This time, his entire head turned to me and we locked eyes. There was a hint of passion? Guilt? Regret? I couldn’t discern what he was silently trying to convey to me in those short seconds. A car horn blaring behind us – that’s Jersey for you – pulled us back to reality. My hand was still on his as the SUV pulled forward across the boulevard leading up to my apartment complex. When I realized this, I immediately pulled it back and missed the warmth of him.

  “The last one on the right, correct?”

  I nodded my head because my mind still buzzed and no words would come.

  As soon as he pulled up to the curb, I unbuckled myself as fast as my hands would move and nearly tumbled to ground below. I had forgotten how high up we were sitting. Josh reached over with lightning speed and grabbed my arm before I was any further on my way to an embarrassing embrace with the sidewalk.

  “You okay?” He eyed me with concern.

  Heat flushed my cheeks and I again nodded, shyly this time.

  “Thank you, I’m fine.”

  Now adjusted to the height difference, I climbed down and closed the door. I walked up the path and to safety from this man who obviously still held a large piece of my heart in his grasp.

  “Good night. Thanks for the ride,” I yelled over my shoulder without bothering to turn around or listen for a response.

  Chapter 5

  “Good morning, Keri,” Carmen offered the greeting in a singsong voice.

  “Morning,” I smiled back at the older Hispanic woman.

  Carmen had taken me under her wing since the first day I started with the New York marketing firm Bank, Drake, Lyle, and Co. For some reason, she was the only one of the other four executive secretaries to take to me. Given, she is titled as the Senior Executive Assistant and, other than the charming Mr. Stephen Bank, Jr., is considered my immediate supervisor but she seemed friendly, not just polite, from day one. If I had any questions, I knew she was the one to go to for advice or assistance. We even shared laughs at the local bar a few times after work. Carmen was a sweetheart and everyone was well aware of that. However, she could also be your worst enemy if you not only made too many mistakes but also had a horrible attitude to match. In two years time, none of the other original executive secretaries are still employed here and a few of their replacements have either been dismissed or moved on to other departments. She demands nothing but the best quality work, but she’s always willing to help you make that happen. If it were not for Carmen Acosta’s support, I have no doubt Mr. Bank would have gotten rid of me a long time ago.

  As I stepped behind the desk and was about the lay my handbag next to my chair, I heard the distinct creek of a door opening followed by large feet padding on the plush carpet that lined the entire office floor.

  “Kerine, is that you?” Mr. Bank yelled from behind me.

  All of the partners had large offices in the rear of the business floor, nearest the windows and a wonderful view of the Manhattan skyline. The area was essentially a large semi-circle. Each secretary had a desk positioned in front of the office of whichever partner she assisted. Carmen assisted Bank, Sr. while I had the pleasure of working under junior and all his Upper West Side finesse.

  Plastering a smile to my face, I glanced over at Carmen who winked at me and then continued to type at her terminal.

  “Yes, Mr. Bank. It’s me.”

  Before I could turn around to address him, he had stepped in front of my desk and stood there with a scowling look on his face. Someone should do him well and advise him the spray-on tan fad is over. However, that someone would not be me, not today, anyway.

  “Ms. White, do you know what time it is?”

  He always addressed me by my last name when he intended to be especially malicious to me.

  “Yes, sir. It is exactly 9 o’clock.”

  “Which means that you are late, does it not?”

  The fake smile I was donning turned into an authentic one.

  “No, sir, it does not.”

  The look of surprise on his face was priceless. Given his upbringing and the fact he probably had not earned his position but rather inherited it, Stephen Bank, Jr. was not accustomed to not getting his way. Today would have to be one of those days when he faced the reality that the world did not revolve around him.

  “Do you mind explaining yourself? Before you do so, may I please remind you of how we have a strict attendance and honesty policy at this firm.”

  “Yes, Mr. Bank, I am well aware of this fact. I am so aware of this fact my actual start time has always been scheduled for 9 AM, yet I have always ch
osen to arrive at 8:30 AM so as to get an early start on my day’s work. Today is probably one of the only days when I have arrived at my company regulated start time and not at least thirty minutes prior to it.”

  The flash in his crystal colored eyes indicated he was angry. He was the type to believe he was far too regal to stoop to common anger so I knew whatever he was thinking in that gel slicked head of his was not going to make it to his lips. At least, I hoped not.

  “Watch your attitude, Ms. White. I have a board meeting at 10 AM sharp and I expect you to be there, on time.”

  He turned on his heels and disappeared into his office and shut the door heavily behind him.

  Sitting down to start up my computer and turn on my monitor, I looked around the office and saw no one else close by so I felt it okay to ask my mentor what was on my mind.

  “What is his problem with me?” I inquired in a low voice.

  Carmen continued her assault on the keys before her and shook her head noncommittally.

  “Don’t worry, sweetie. His day will come. You just keep on doing your job as well as you do and everything else will work itself out.”

  Although her words of encouragement were to the point, I still couldn’t shake the feeling my superior was out to get me.

  “How are those classes coming, dear?” Carmen chimed in over my thoughts.

  “Huh? Oh, we’re done for the semester.”

  “Not long now until you finish your degree, right?”

  I thought I had already mentioned to Carmen I had a Bachelor of Arts degree in Journalism and I was only returning to finish up some required business courses. I started Eastern States University with a major in marketing and was then persuaded by an unnamed associate whom I was madly in love with at the time to change to journalism, which so happened to be his major.

  “Yeah, only one more semester and I’ll be done. This will be my second bachelor’s.”